You know you’re a hot star when you check into rehab and you get millions of internet hits all because you’re on a hit show. It’s a Celebrity, buzzed.
This is the case of Cory Monteith of “Glee;”whose rep stated that the actor “has voluntarily admitted himself to a treatment facility for substance addiction.”
Is this a thumbs up or thumbs down?
Cory gets a big thumbs up for admitting he has a problem and doing something about it; unlike other “stars” who think a rehab center has revolving doors (Lindsay Lohan, Tom Sizemore etc.) or, they believe these doors are closed just for them—like Amanda Bynes.
Then again, maybe drugs aren’t to blame for Ms. Bynes recent behavior. Maybe she’s just flat out “cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs” or is it “Coca(ine) Puffs?” Yes, it’s way better to enter rehab than to sing about not going to rehab (Amy Winehouse).
But a small thumbs down to Cory for even announcing his “problem.” Would anybody care if Cory was a boom operator on “Glee;” who had to put himself in rehab because he kept dropping a boom mike on Lea Michele’s head? Or, if he was a rock star, him being hooked on all drugs is so “yawn, oh-hum” part for the profession? Or, is Cory’s announcement his “pre-emptive strike;” so the tabloids won’t get a big scoop that he’s in rehab? Or…
Is Cory’s big scoop his way of getting attention—for himself and “Glee.” After all, American viewers have fallen to around half of what the series was bringing in at the height of its popularity. Still, Fox is planning to start negotiations soon for a fifth season so who is to argue over (half) success?
“Glee”producers should milk Cory’s rehab storyline by incorporating it into their series. That is, have “Glee” do a musical based on Cory’s travails. “The Music Man” in “Glee’s” hands becomes “”The Meth Man;” where the pool hall in River City is where an 8-ball (of drugs) fills the side pockets. Cory can then play Tony in “West Side Story” where he sings this drug ditty to to the tune of “Maria” to Lindsay Lohan, who plays Maria:
Oh, Adderall,
You want some,
But I did it all!
I needed it so bad,
I have to meet my Dad,
He even wants to put,
Me in rehab!
Oh, damn it all!
Now who took all my Adderall!?
I–Wait. Stop the music! Lindsay? Are you okay?
LINDSAYas MARIA: Huh, um, excuse me….I’m feeling…kinda….Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz